The cream of the hadiths
Here is a selection of sahih, or authentic, hadiths recounting episodes from the life of Muhammad. Islam considers him the greatest human being who ever lived, and he did not disagree: he called himself the master of the children of Adam, adding, modestly, that he was not boasting (Sahih Muslim 2278; Jami' at-Tirmidhi 3615).
The hadiths also record his teachings, and the guru of Islam left nothing to chance, not even the most intimate matters. How should one wipe after relieving oneself? With stones, at least three, and never with the right hand (Sahih Muslim 262). In an odd number (Sahih al-Bukhari 162). Never with bone or dung, which are food for the jinn (Sahih al-Bukhari 3860). The polytheists of his time had noticed:
"Your Apostle teaches you about everything, even about excrement."— Remark made to Salman al-Farsi, who answered "Yes" (Sahih Muslim 262)
It was about time. With only 86 billion neurons, humanity could never have worked out such a complex procedure on its own. Muslims call the era before Islam the Jahiliyya, the Age of Ignorance. Now we know of what.
Jesus spoke of the latrine only to say that what ends up there defiles no one: what defiles a man comes out of his heart (Mark 7:18-23). Then he went back to preaching love of one's neighbour. With all due respect to the Son of God, there is more to life than love. Six centuries later, Allah and his Messenger brought the conversation back to practical matters. Muhammad remains by far the most pragmatic prophet the God of Abraham ever sent.
Apply these hadiths and your life may well change: Muhammad was a formidable life coach. But do not expect spirituality. You will find down-to-earth instructions and threats, the house specialty. Here again, the contrast with Jesus is total. Could Muhammad be the Antichrist? He would make a convincing candidate. According to the First Epistle of John, the antichrist "denies the Father and the Son" (1 John 2:22), and Allah "neither begets nor is born" (Quran 112:3). In the 8th century, John of Damascus already called Islam "a forerunner of the Antichrist".
The original of every hadith can be checked on sunnah.com.
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Narrated Ibn `Abbas
The Prophet (ﷺ) cursed effeminate men (those men who are in the similitude (assume the manners of women) and those women who assume the manners of men, and he said, "Turn them out of your houses ." The Prophet (ﷺ) turned out such-and-such man, and `Umar turned out such-and-such woman.
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Narrated Aisha
Umar bin Al-Khattab used to say to Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) "Let your wives be veiled" But he did not do so. The wives of the Prophet (ﷺ) used to go out to answer the call of nature at night only at Al-Manasi. Once Sauda, the daughter of Zam`a went out and she was a tall woman. `Umar bin Al-Khattab saw her while he was in a gathering, and said, "I have recognized you, O Sauda!" He (Umar) said so as he was anxious for some Divine orders regarding the veil (the veiling of women.) So Allah revealed the Verse of veiling. (Al-Hijab; a complete body cover excluding the eyes).
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Narrated Sahl bin Sa`d
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Whoever guarantees me (the chastity of) what is between his legs (i.e. his private parts), and what is between his jaws (i.e., his tongue), I guarantee him Paradise."
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Narrated Abdullah
Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "The blood of a Muslim who confesses that none has the right to be worshipped but Allah and that I am His Apostle, cannot be shed except in three cases: In Qisas for murder, a married person who commits illegal sexual intercourse and the one who reverts from Islam (apostate) and leaves the Muslims."
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Narrated `Ikrima
Some Zanadiqa (atheists) were brought to Ali and he burnt them. The news of this event, reached Ibn Abbas who said, "If I had been in his place, I would not have burnt them, as Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) forbade it, saying, 'Do not punish anybody with Allah's punishment (fire).' I would have killed them according to the statement of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ), 'Whoever changed his Islamic religion, then kill him.'"
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Narrated Abu Huraira
Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "Whoever obeys me, obeys Allah, and whoever disobeys me, disobeys Allah, and whoever obeys the ruler I appoint, obeys me, and whoever disobeys him, disobeys me."
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Narrated Anas bin Malik
Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "You should listen to and obey, your ruler even if he was an Ethiopian (black) slave whose head looks like a raisin."
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Narrated `Umar
I came and behold, Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) was staying on a Mashroba (attic room) and a black slave of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) was at the top if its stairs. I said to him, "(Tell the Prophet) that here is `Umar bin Al-Khattab (asking for permission to enter)." Then he admitted me.
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Narrated Abu Huraira
Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "All my followers will enter Paradise except those who refuse." They said, "O Allah's Messenger (ﷺ)! Who will refuse?" He said, "Whoever obeys me will enter Paradise, and whoever disobeys me is the one who refuses (to enter it)."
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“It is narrated on the authority of Jarir that he heard (the Holy Prophet) saying, The slave who fled from his master committed an act of infidelity as long as he would not return to him.”
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“Jarir b. Abdullah reported it from the Holy Prophet: When the slave runs away from his master, his prayer is not accepted.”
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“Abu Huraira reported Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) as saying: When anyone wipes himself with pebbles (after answering the call of nature) he must make use of an odd number and when any one of you performs ablution he must snuff in his nose water and then clean it. Salman said that (one among) the polytheists remarked: I see that your friend even teaches you about the excrement. He replied; Yes, he has in fact forbidden us that anyone amongst us should cleanse himself with his right hand, or face the Qibla. He has forbidden the use of dung or bone for it, and he has also instructed us not to use less than three pebbles (for this purpose).”
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Reported by Shaqiq
I was sitting in the company of Abdullah and Abu Musa when Abu Musa said: O 'Abd al-Rahman (kunya of 'Abdullah b. Mas'ud), what would you like a man to do about the prayer if he experiences a seminal emission or has sexual intercourse but does not find water for a month? 'Abdullah said: He should not perform tayammum even if he does not find water for a month. 'Abdullah said: Then what about the verse in Sura Ma'ida:" If you do not find water, betake yourself to clean dust"? 'Abdullah said: If they were granted concession on the basis of this verse, there is a possibility that they would perform tayammum with dust on finding water very cold for themselves. Abu Musa said to Abdullah: You have not heard the words of 'Ammar: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) sent me on an errand and I had a seminal emission, but could find no water, and rolled myself in dust just as a beast rolls itself. I came to the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) then and made a mention of that to him and he (the Holy Prophet) said: It would have been enough for you to do thus. Then he struck the ground with his hands once and wiped his right hand with the help of his left hand and the exterior of his palms and his face. 'Abdullah said: Didn't you see that Umar was not fully satisfied with the words of 'Ammar only?
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Reported by Abu Dharr
“The Messenger of 'Allah (ﷺ) said: When any one of you stands for prayer and there is a thing before him equal to the back of the saddle that covers him and in case there is not before him (a thing) equal to the back of the saddle, his prayer would be cut off by (passing of an) ass, woman, and black Dog. I said: O Abu Dharr, what feature is there in a black dog which distinguish it from the red dog and the yellow dog? He said: O, son of my brother, I asked the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) as you are asking me, and he said: The black dog is a devil.”
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“Hammam b. Munabbih said: These are some of the a hadith of Muhammad. the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ), transmitted to us on the authority of Abu Huraira. So he narrated one hadith out of them (as this): The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: No woman should observe fast when her spouse is present (in the house) but with his permission. And she should not admit any (mahram) in his house, while he (her husband) is present, but with his permission. And whatever she spends from his earnings without his sanction, for him is half the reward.”
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Reported by A'isha (Allah be pleased with her)
“Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) married me when I was six years old, and I was admitted to his house when I was nine years old.”
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“'A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) reported that Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) married her when she was seven years old, and he was taken to his house as a bride when she was nine, and her dolls were with her; and when he (the Holy Prophet) died she was eighteen years old.”
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“Jabir (Allah be pleased with him) reported that a man came to Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) and said: I have a slave-girl who is our servant and she carries water for us and I have intercourse with her, but I do not want her to conceive. He said: Practise 'azl, if you so like, but what is decreed for her will come to her. The person stayed back (for some time) and then came and said: The girl has become pregnant, whereupon he said: I told you what was decreed for her would come to her.”
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“A'isha (Allah be pleased with, her) reported that it had been revealed in the Holy Qur'an that ten clear sucklings make the marriage unlawful, then it was abrogated (and substituted) by five sucklings and Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) died and it was before that time (found) in the Holy Qur'an (and recited by the Muslims).”
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“A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) reported that Sahla bint Suhail came to Allah's Apostle (may peace be upon him) and said: Messenger of Allah, I see on the face of Abu Hudhaifa (signs of disgust) on entering of Salim (who is an ally) into (our house), whereupon Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) said: Suckle him. She said: How can I suckle him as he is a grown-up man? Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) smiled and said: I already know that he is a young man 'Amr has made this addition in his narration that he participated in the Battle of Badr and in the narration of Ibn 'Umar (the words are): Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) laughed.”
